I've learned recently that it's really easy to get discouraged and down on yourself. But it is also really easy to find the strength within to carry on. I love the quote, "When life gets too hard to stand, kneel." I think I really learned that one in a hard way, but I'm so grateful for this lesson learned. I've come to know and feel God's presence in such an intimate way, and I would not trade it for anything.
I feel like now, more than any other time in my life, Heavenly Father has given me a blessing to see people through his eyes. I am really learning to love others, and it's helping me overcome my pessimism. I've been praying for the power of discernment, and to have more love and forgiveness in my heart so I'm not so easily offended. I think because of a recent, very painful experience that I had, my self esteem has just been really low, and it made me really insecure. I'm realizing that this can be overcome. It has to be a conscious decision, and it involves listening to the Lord instead of the ugly whisperings of Satan.
I'm reading a book right now called "The Traveler's Gift" by Andy Andrews. It reminds me of another book I read recently called "The Ultimate Gift," but I think I like this one even better. There are so many little gems of wisdom. This morning I read this:
"I will now and forevermore silently offer my forgiveness even to those who do not see that they need it. By the act of forgiving, I am no longer consumed by unproductive thoughts. I give up my bitterness. I am content in my soul and effective again with my fellowman.
I will greet this day with a forgiving spirit. I will forgive those who criticize me unjustly.
Knowing that slavery in any form is wrong, I also know that the person who lives a life according to the opinion of others is a slave...Their scorn does not affect my attitude or action...I know that criticism is part of the price paid for leaping past mediocrity."
I admit I'm a slow learner. It's taken me way too long to learn this lesson. I guess I'm still learning this lesson. But I think I'm finding peace. I'm learning to try my best, and not put so much stock in what other people think of me. I'm trying to give others the benefit of the doubt. I know the pain of unfair judgement. I will not judge others. I will live life with a smile on my face and a song in my heart, because life is beautiful. People are good. All of them. There is kindness and goodness at the core of every soul.